yes, if you refer to the image in my post my MX records 'were'
10 @ mail
10 mail mail
i changed them to
10 @ mail.thesecond.org
10 mail mail.thesecond.org
and it works now.
Now i need to figure out how to setup reverse DNS on godaddy and my server properly because until i do that, gmail and yahoo keep sending my emails to the spam folder.
Ive been using this tool to check
http://www.debouncer.com/reverse-dns-check
any ideas? :\